Hmmm placing this one into a category was hard....
Anway. The title really says it all. I've attempted to put lol cat's style speach into Ancient Greek. As I couldn't really play around with the spelling I had to make do with mutilating the inflections.
1st sentance: actually doesn't have a conjugated verb. "Pausas' is the aorist 1st person singular particible equates to 'stopping (completed action- all to do with 'aspect)". 'Einai' is the infinitive of the verb 'to be' and is really there becuase it goes nicely with 'tinai' (technically a slightly emphatic 'somethings'. Iota is actually used to add emphasis). 'Egw' is just 'I' in the nomanative case.
2nd sentance: This one does have a conjugated verb, 'exoimi' with the little 'an' latching on to indicate a polite request. I didn't mess with either word's form. 'Noun' is simply 'now'. 'Ta Xeisbarga' is a completely fictitious word (I even checked in the big Lydell and Scott Greek Lexicon- a huge book. No such word could be found)So I made up a (probably) 2nd declension neuter noun. It's in the plural too. Basically it was the closest I could get a word to sound like cheesburger. I'm pretty sure there wasn't anything remotely like a cheeseburger in the Anceint Greek world and I don't think a litteral 'cheese in bread' would have sounded as good. And I don't know what bread is in Greek. Cheese is 'to turon'. The 'moi' in the sentance is the 1st person sing pronoun in the dative case. Which means the subject of the sentance is repeated in two different cases- I'm not sure that's actually possible. I just used it to emphasise the giving of the cheeseburgers to the cat.
Out of all my watchers there's only one who I'm pretty confident will actually understand at least most of that. And frankley I doubt any one else will care that much but I like to justify why I've done something. Any further queries just comment. The Greek words in the above passage aren't going to be pronounced as they might look like to an English speaker. I can't type non-Latin characters straight out and I couldn't be bothered copy and pasting from word all the time.
Oh yes. We were reading the Lysistrata when I came up with the idea. I highly recomend this piece to read.